Monday, November 15, 2010
A random search landed on these two ads this morning. Not really much in common, but interesting nonetheless:
"Lost on Land," &c. - Amazed that you would cherish "a vain, selfish jilt." You're a poor joker - very poor. Cousins quite serene.
I don't know what to make of this! How weird! None of these lines connect together. The first sounds like a lovers' quarrel, like one of them is hanging onto a grudge. But the next line makes it sound like there's some kind of prank going on. And the third, "Cousins quite serene"? What has that got to do with anything? Not to mention the name: "Lost on Land." Very bizarre. I got nothing.
Now this one really caught my eye:
Disappeared Thursday evening a lady about 20 years of age, suffering under partial derangement caused by sickness; black silk dress, trimmed with velvet; velvet basquine, trimmed with lace; black velvet bonnet. Any information sent to Inspector Diles, Police Headquarters, will be gratefully received.I smell a mystery!! I see lots of "gone missing," "disappeared" ads in the personals. Usually from family members and not the police, but pretty common in general. However, this one is striking. Look how the lady is dressed. Black silk with velvet, a velvet coat with lace, and a velvet bonnet? How many sick and deranged women go out dressed in the height of expensive fashion? That is a pretty snazzy outfit for a woman who is crazy. I suspect something more sinister!! Like, the lady was kidnapped! But she escaped! And now the corrupt police officer who was complicit in her abduction is trying to find her again! Because she's being held ransom for her fortune! Or an evil, mustache-twirling villain is trying to force her to marry him against her will! So the idea is that if anyone finds her and she starts telling them about her horrible abduction, they'll just think she's crazy and bring her back to her captors! Brilliant!!
I think that's a way more likely scenario than this silliness about her being partially deranged, don't you?
©2010 Pam Epstein