Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Here's the correspondence I promised yesterday. (By the way, I was taking Wednesdays off for awhile, but now that I'm done teaching I might post on different days.) Warning: by the end of this series of letters, you will be close to tears, if not actually crying.
Shaky.-Thanks, I needed it. Hope you are better. Write soon. Semper fidelis. Shaky
Shaky--Received; also want to see you; except Wednesday, any day, no change in Shaky.
Shaky.-O.N. Negra-If, as I know, you have changed, why do not tell the naked truth? Shaky Negro.
Shaky--Week is gone and nothing: will be ready any day except Wednesdays; I am really anxious and still true. Shaky.
Shaky.-Thanks. I feel happy. I have not lost my shaky. Make it as soon as possible. Forever. Shaky.
Shaky-By a mistake nothing appeared Sunday. Happy New Year, with plenty of love for and from Shaky. Answer.
Shaky, dear, do you remember last day of the year? When will your poor Shaky hear from you?
Shaky.-I long to see you. Any day next week except Wednesday. Your Shaky.
Shaky, dear-Why so silent? Are you sick? Say something to your anxious Shaky.
Shaky, dear-What is the matter? Thirty-seven days without a word to your poor Shaky.
Shaky-Negro has put a personal every week. Not a word? Really anxious. Shaky.
Shaky! Shaky!-By humankind sake let me hear from you; to answers. Shaky.
Shaky, Shaky, Shaky-Let me hear from you. Do not let me suffer any longer. Shaky.
Shaky-Thanks; will be patient; do not be long; God bless you. Yours. Shaky.
Shaky, Shaky, Shaky, Shaky-I can not stand any longer. Shaky.
Am I the only one hoping that the author of these ads didn't commit suicide after the last one? This series started at the beginning of November and didn't end until the following March, and they started getting worse and worse starting at the beginning of January. Can you imagine? I mean, honestly, Shaky the author (I think it's clear that it's always the same person writing) really should have taken the hint by, say, mid-February, but I guess when you're in love it's hard to let go. Poor thing. Shaky the addressee was really cruel. I said in my last post that this one was entertaining, but now I feel guilty. It's just so sad!
Anyway, it took me about an hour to get this whole thing put together and transcribed, so I'm keeping my commentary to a minimum. There's not really much to add here anyway; it's pretty self-evident what's going on...
Having trouble reading the ads? Click one to enlarge!
©2009 Pam Epstein