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The fun never ends

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

These three ads have absolutely nothing to do with each other, but they're from the same day and they're funny. So, in no particular order:

Stephen - If you forget the difference between my name and yours again I will have no more mercy on you.

Okay, what? I really have no reasonable explanation for this one (so what else is new?). The only thing I can think of is that Stephen is dithering about marrying his lady friend, maybe trying to get some premarital action, and she's threatening to go all "Single Ladies" on him. But honestly, that's a stretch. However, it's the best I can come up with.

Here's another stalker! He writes: Academy Ball, last night. - Will the lady dressed in blue correspond with the gent who followed her down the stairs at about 2 1/2? Address Mr. Louis, box 4,461 Post office.

But this one has some interesting things about it; most notably, the dude is following some poor girl down the stairs at 2:30am. I assume that's what the 2 1/2 means; I've never seen that before, and along with some other clues, makes me wonder about who this guy is. He calls himself a "gent," which is very rare. The only other place I've seen it was in this ad from Elise, and as someone in the comments speculated, I think that's a good class marker. Let's just say that I doubt the "gent" is a gentleman.

By far my favorite of the day: Bengal Chutna has arrived at last. You can get it now. Tiger.

Love! I am going to go out on a limb here and say that there was not, in fact, a Bengal tiger being delivered to New York City, though that would be pretty awesome. So, it's code for something, but I wonder what? As one newspaper article from the time said, "We can only guess and speculate" what they mean, but a person "who does not know the key to the mystery is apt to surround it in his own mind with highly colored attributes..."

Yup, I'll buy that.

Having trouble reading the ads? Click one to enlarge!

©2009 Pam Epstein


Bianca C October 27, 2009 at 1:16 PM  

Stephen: Sr. vs Jr. perhaps?

Why would someone put something like that in the paper anyway? LOL

Ms Avery October 27, 2009 at 1:53 PM  

I'm guessing it wasn't just chutney, either... could it be slang for something illicit being imported from India -- opium, maybe? And this could be a signal to dealers saying that a new shipment had come in?

Pam October 28, 2009 at 7:47 AM  

Bianca - maybe, but as you say, why put it in the paper?

Ms Avery - that's as good a guess as any...Do they have opium in India?

Mario October 28, 2009 at 10:21 PM  

I think the first one is nothing more than a flirty bit of I'm thinking of you... in an age before the internet or the phone, before even home delivered mail.

As for what the name is--"Stephanie" seems not to feel right--I have no idea, if it's a first name. But I could also be that they are courting and have similar last names, that a Stephen Moore introduced her as Ms. Stephanie Morrison or something like that.

drwende October 28, 2009 at 11:13 PM  

I'm thinking the first one is accusing Stephen of forgery or impersonation, though why it'd be useful to do that in the classifieds rather than in person is beyond me.

Balls could go on until dawn, so 2:30 might have been around the supper hour. It is odd that the gent could find no one to give him a proper introduction; even if it was a subscription ball, the hostesses ought to have been able to introduce any gentleman to any lady.

UrsulaV November 5, 2009 at 4:55 PM  

I went immediately for "Her name was Stephanie, and he was calling his own name at the wrong moment," but possibly I have a dirty mind.

Pam November 5, 2009 at 10:39 PM  

UrsulaV — HA! If your mind is dirty mine must be too...I had similar ideas.

Anonymous December 27, 2013 at 5:38 PM  

I thinking maybe the first one is something like they have now, the legal adverts. Someone warning someone else they know they've been impersonating them and they'll press Charges next time and that the original will not be held responsible for the Impostors debts. Just a thought....

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