Tragic lovers

Is it wrong that I find the ads from people who were clearly suffering kind of funny? The Victorians, they really knew how to turn a phrase. Read what they had to say:

I have so many, many lonely hours to think and dream of you, sweet Constance: your voice well remembered; your eyes never forgotten; I live on hope, the fragrant flower of the heart.

Hast thou forgotten, Paul, what thou didst learn? Never allow evil to grow. Prevention sure better than cure. So much at stake, be wide awake. Early attention the best prevention. Why dost thou not appear at once? Will I go with thee and keep thy candle? Pauline

Come on! How can you not giggle a little bit? I mean, the first is kind of sweet and poetic, I guess. But Pauline's ad, let's face it, is kind of dreadful.

Now this ad appeared in the Personals every day for about a week. It read, "Sissy - Thanks a thousand times, for your indifference. Have watched your actions and know now how much you care for me. Sis." I kind of imagine "Sis" as a youngish guy who would challenge you to a duel if you looked at him sideways. And a few days later, a different ad appeared:

"Sissy - I must see you, if only for a minute to speak to. Won't you grant me this small request? Sis."

Poor guy! I do laugh a little, but in all honesty I kind of love him and the others above. They make these anonymous people real to me, even though I won't ever know who they were.

And speaking of the great unknown...


Having trouble reading the ads? Click one to enlarge!

©2009 Pam Epstein